At ngayon lang ulit ako magsusulat

Ang hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon, yung tipong hindi mo nagagawa yung mga bagay na gusto mo gawin dahil may mas importante ka pang dapat na gawin kaysa yung bagay na gusto mo talaga. Ang hirap baliktaran ng katotohanan, tila daig pa yung assignment nung prof namin sa Ecology na wala naman yatang ginagawa kundi mag “emote” lang. Bakit kaya yung mga tao pang sobrang galing at kahanga-hanga ang siya pang mapagkumbaba? Yung iba parang low-profile naman pero ang asta parang diyos na dapat halikan ang paa habang dumadaan. Nakakabanas na nakakabobo. Sa lahat kasi ng bagay ay ang pagiging mapagpakumbaba ang isa sa mga pinakamahirap na magagawa ng tao. Hindi pwedeng sabihin sa iba na ikaw ay mapagkumababa dahil hindi na pagpapakumbaba ang gayon. Ipinapakita ito at hindi sinasabi. Hayaan mo ng ibang tao na ang makapansin sa iyo na hindi ka mayabang di katulad ng karamihan diyan.

Humility is like a body odor. You have it yet you don’ t know it.

Simple thoughts na medyo bumabagabag sa akin ngayon. Naglipana na kasi ang mga mayayabang na tao sa paligid ko. Buti na lang may mga totoo pang tao na natitira at maasahan.

Makatulog na nga lang.

Down with Big Brother.

Fast Forward - Arvin Jay Villanueva

What if I say I am not like the others? –Foo Fighters

Given that such life remote control exists (a cliché element in any sci-fi movies today), I wish to go back to those times where the atmosphere is as innocent as carefree. As the luminescent beam shove my life like a stupid git, I am now on the brink of infinite confusion on how things have been the way it is now. Far as the eye could see, those memories are waning like bittersweet love letters thrown at the threshold good for nothing. It’s like going back from the start and moving on in an alternate reality. Things have been abnormal for me. Or is it otherwise for I believe in a reality that seems to be extinct? Nobody cares, forget it. Not even the people I care the most.

I am longing for that remote control. I like to fast forward this chapter or maybe I can also click the scene selection to avoid and escape the gory scene in a horror movie.
Salutations are stupid, desolation is ironic and writing seems apathetic these days but in spite of every misery from these harsh realities, I still try to be a sensible person as possible. But that doesn’t mean I am being a bogus here. I try to be one because it is the only way to accept the truth. I still cannot see why those people seems like they doesn’t care anymore after all these years that we have been through and all of a sudden, everything just popped up and vanished into thin air. I have enough for such but I don’t give up yet. There is still this intricate possibility for a change. Life is not constant and uncertainty is one of its surprises. Change topic. I sound stupid.

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” a famous adage from Gautama Buddha.

This made me thinking while browsing for quotes and it is one of those sensible quotes that I have seen recently. It contradicted my belief because for me, past is part of the present for without the past, you cannot be what you are now without the conflicting events from it. Future is the aftermath of the present and in order to have an equilibrium direction for guidance, you need to plan for your future. They are intertwined, not separated. But of all three that were mentioned, the most complex is the future. Future is blurred and could be unexpected. It is just like gambling and you may not know who will be the winner. And I have already written before that going to the future is absolutely possible but changing or going to the past is not. Ironic but true.

Now I sound like an alien…